Recalling the Brief Life of Chandler Grafner - Why Was this Child Starved to Death?
Today’s Denver Post provides an in depth update to our Jon Phillips and Sarah Berry Starve Child to Death: Seven-Year-Old Weighed only 30 Pounds story. There are also links to several more stories about the case.
It’s a sad tale of a mother who couldn’t keep her pants on, the controlling men in her life, and the other relatives and friends who were unable to help.
Tags: Chandler-Grafner, child-abuse, Denver-Post, foster-care, foster-child, Jon-Phillips, Sarah-Berry, starve-childRelated Stories
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22 opinions for Recalling the Brief Life of Chandler Grafner - Why Was this Child Starved to Death?
Michael
May 20, 2007 at 1:17 pm
Confusing web of relationships the mother had. It seems like there were at least a few willing father’s that got shut out.
Lauren
May 21, 2007 at 4:47 am
after reading that story i have no idea what is going on with this one. i am crying my eyes out for this little guy. I dont know how no one was involved with him and where was social services? if you get temp custody of a child somone has to follow up!!! he was another cute little boy, is killing children the new trend? this is pathetic and i feel so sorry for him! there are too many kids dying and the sad thing is not even half of them make it in the news…….what a terrible world. i cant even be mean to my son at all after reading all this bullshit
NIKKI
May 21, 2007 at 7:26 am
THANKS ANNE-MARIE! When I first read his story I was a little upset that they wouldn’t even give him a name. Not that it made any difference. But to say his name makes him more real to us. I am so sad for him and his baby brother. How he must be suffering. (just shakes head in disbelief!)
Katie
May 21, 2007 at 7:48 am
This is one of those stories that is beyond comprehension. There just aren’t any words for the anger, frustration and sense of injustice that accompany a sorry tale like this. These people should be locked in a room for two months with no food and see how they like it. They aren’t God, they aren’t superhuman, and as such have no right playing that part with someone else’s life. If they want to be a waste of space and destroy their own lives, fine. But when you take on the responsibility of raising a child and then destroy that child’s life in retaliation against the things that are making you upset with yourself, you have got problems. Jail time and counseling are definitely necessary for everyone involved. AND WHERE WERE SOCIAL SERVICES????
NIKKI
May 21, 2007 at 9:14 am
When you look at his picture you just want to kiss his little cheeks! He was soooo cute! How could anyone want to hurt him! how could a person look at that face and not “want” to feed him! My family showed love by offering food! Really, u know the granny that says aawww he is so cute! baby are u hungry? That is the kinda face he had. U just want to pinch his cheeks and then fill ‘em with something good to eat!
JoAnna
Jun 5, 2007 at 11:36 am
What a sad state this world is in!!!Neighbors used to know eachother, watch out for eachother, protect eachother. Not anymore. Everyone is too busy, or doesn’t want to get involved. Or we tell ourselves “it’s none of our business.” Yes it is. God Bless the nosey neighbor that sees what time you get home and what your kids are doing when you’re gone. How sad and how tragic this story is. Even sadder is that it’s happening again, right now, there are little children starving, being abused, molested, and we just go about our day, oblivious to the pain and suffering that is happening right next to us. Be observant. Listen to that little voice inside you that says “something’s not right.” When in doubt, check it out.
DebraLee
Jun 30, 2007 at 6:29 am
I am so glad to see this website. It is time that we stand up and point our fingers at what we can no longer continue to tolerate.
Unfortunately, in this world of ‘tolerable’ wrongs, we have all been nearly taught to look the other way . . . that someone else will “interfere” and we won’t have to endure conflict. We look the other way in the schools, we look the other way in the grocery stores, and we even look the other way in our churches.
At some point, we (You and Me) must, and I mean MUST, decide we will not look the other way. We will confront individuals, respectfully, and out of concern. And, we MUST decide that we realize there will be conflict at times, our opinion will not be welcomed by that parent . . . or that child, most of the time.
Here’s the sad truth: Most social workers get into their career field because they truly have a heart that wants to help the unfortunately children. That is the first truth. Most sadly, however, it is only a matter of time before the very hope they had to make a difference becomes discouraged and disheartened. They are beat down by the red tape of bureaucracy, the lack of cooperation and response from the natural parents, the children who don’t want to leave the their real parents (in spite of the abuses), and the foster parents who are in this ‘saving game’ for the money. Many of their battles are in the courts, not in the homes. They don’t have time to protect once they children are removed, there is so much time that must go into the courts and keeping the natural parents away from the children.
That discouragement, compounded by the mountains of paperwork and cases they have to manage, forces many of the social workers to simply ‘check-out’ emotionally, and mentally. They have families to go home to. They try to live a life in a few short hours each evening that resembles a healthy normal life, apart from a world of abuse that takes up most of their waking hours.
I say this, not to excuse their lack of defined “job” performance, but to help YOU and ME understand it so we can begin to challenge it from an informed viewpoint. It is the ONLY way we will ever make a difference. YOU and ME.
Because of the tremendous emotional turmoil and disgust with the ‘real world’, is is a known fact that Emergency Room doctors and nurses burn out in just a few short years and have to move into some other area of medical work. These social workers don’t have that privilege. They are stuck for years and years and years. And, to cope with the horrors of their jobs, they check out.
What we have to do is confront the individuals as we see things occur. It happens in front of us almost every time we are in a public setting. With respect. With concern.
We also have to start petitioning our Senators, our Congressmen, our Governor, our Mayors, our city Councilmen, our school Principles, and our school teachers. Over and over and over again.
Perhaps, just perhaps, this website (and a great tool it is), could structure a couple template letters for your readers to download . . . something they could easily edit as needed, but could be used easily.
And, perhaps, just perhaps, this website could also list the Senators, Congressmen, and Governors names and addresses for ease.
IT IS TIME. We are being destroyed from within our own borders. Stand up, and take notice.
Bonnie’s Blog of Crime Chandler Grafner murder 5/08/07 Denver, CO *autopsy showed boy was starved to death* «
Jul 9, 2007 at 7:25 pm
[…] Recalling the Brief Life of Chandler Grafner - Why Was this Child Starved to Death? (an excellent story) Two Held In Death Of ‘Malnourished’ 7-Year-Old Boy Couple Charged With Murder For Allegedly Letting Boy Starve Aunt Says Family Will Fight For Custody Of Chandler’s Brother Couple Face Murder Charges In Malnourished Boy’s Death Human Services To Investigate Boy’s Death DA Charges 2 After Denver Boy’s Death Investigators: Warning Signs Before Boy’s Death Coroner: 34-Pound Boy Died Of Starvation Autopsy Shows Dead Denver Boy Suffered From Starvation, Dehydration […]
JPJ
Jul 11, 2007 at 11:53 am
My heart is broken for this child. I’ll never forget poor Chandler as long as I live. I hope and pray that he’s safe in the arms of God and that he has no memory of the horror he suffered.
My question is this: Why would someone go through the trouble to get custody of a child and end up treating him so horribly? How can anybody with a conscious treat a child like that? There’s a special place in hell for people like Jon Phillips. I hope his remaining days on this earth are sheer torment. Fucking bastard!
Dana
Jul 12, 2007 at 2:11 pm
This story is completely heart breaking. I pray for jail justice for both of the scum bags!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don’t think I will ever forget the name Chandler Grafner. RIP baby.
JN
Jul 13, 2007 at 12:04 pm
After reading so many stories on this website it still just disgusts me how many so called “parents” there are in the world. Debralee- you provided a very inciteful and thought provoking post, I for one am not going to sit around and read anymore horror stories of what happens to innocent children, children that didnt ask to be born, children who are bought into this world by stupid, selfish women. I am going to start doing something, dont know how yet, but I am going to do something, if we can prevent just one more child from dying, then we have done something.
(sorry for the babbling rant, just felt I needed to get that off my chest)
Update on Chandler Grafner Starvation Story - Court Documents Unsealed
Jul 14, 2007 at 5:59 am
[…] only 3o pounds at the time of his death. PBB reported on the Chandler Grafner story back on May 20 and May […]
scott
Jul 19, 2007 at 7:50 pm
After reading about chandler grafner,I am wondering how these two psychos would like to be locked up in a closet,for a day or two.As JN was saying I am wondering what the hell,I can do to change this ,for some other child. As a single grandparent raising two children,ages 8 months,6years,this is so messed up. I hope chandler is in a better place.
Annie143
Jul 21, 2007 at 1:52 am
I have been trying to find out what happened at a preliminary hearing for July 11 and someone emailed me that it was rescheduled for August.
The investigation into the States responsibilities in this case was supposed to done the first of July. I am not sure how a person would go about finding out the results.
I do not intend for this child to be forgotten. I dont know how to do websites, etc, I just want to keeping prodding officials and newspapers to report on this little boy.
Everything I have read about him keeps talking about how sweet he was. A sweet angel. He was doomed from birth it seems like and I was angry when I read about how many people said he was so loved and yet…..this happens……
jcgloxhesm
Jul 31, 2007 at 8:12 pm
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Annika
Aug 17, 2007 at 12:17 pm
Everyone knows that this is beyond sad, I mean how could someone do this? There is nothing more precious than a child, and no child would ever do anything to deserve being locked in a closet and starved to death. As a very lucky and privledged teen, I know I probably cannot relate at all to this, but this deadly trend absolutely needs to stop. I pray and hope that little Chandler is in a better place and in the arms of God.
JPJ
Aug 18, 2007 at 5:41 pm
The defense attorney for these two scum bags is getting to work saying that Chandler was “always thin” and “ate like a horse but never gained weight.” Yeah, right. I guess Chandler always shit in a cat box. I guess Chandler always had multiple cuts, burns and bruises on him. I guess Chandler liked being locked in a closet and given ‘mean showers’.
If for some reason Jon Phillips manages to get off, I swear to God I’ll hunt him down myself!
Annie143
Aug 18, 2007 at 8:11 pm
If either Jon Phillips or Sarah Berry get away with anything less than life without parole, I will hunt them down myself. They are scum.
They were arraigned on August 16th and next time up is September 2007. I think that is when they enter a plea. It better not be NOT GUILTY. And, I hope she doesnt agree to testify against him and gets a lighter sentence.
I want both of them in the general population of the prison system and lets see how they like being picked on and abused.
JPJ
Aug 19, 2007 at 5:50 pm
Cut and paste the link below; it’s a slide show of Chandler photos. Take a good look at them, and then think about how he died. I’m sure everyone here would have given Chandler a safe home, a warm bed, lots of food and plenty of hugs. Yet, he got stuck with two devils. I will never forget this poor child as long as I live.
http://www.thedenverchannel.com/slideshow/news/13910958/detail.html
Annie143
Aug 19, 2007 at 6:54 pm
The slideshow was so sweet and sad. I can hardly look at pictures of this child without crying. He was such a doll.
I am going to link it to his thread on the CourtTV boards when they open on Monday. I am trying hard to keep this little boys name in the news so that he gets justice.
Annie143
Aug 28, 2007 at 7:35 pm
http://www.denverpost.com/news/ci_6740617
this is the full fatality review by the Child Protective Services on Chandler. What a joke.
Jon Phillips is mentioned several times as having abused Chandler or Chandler being afraid of him. This is so hard to take in.
rockdoll_71
Nov 27, 2007 at 1:18 am
What a beautiful boy. I can’t believe anyone would treat him like that. What a tragic, tragic waste.
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