I’m still somewhat confused on this whole thing. First, the kid’s name. It’s now Sean Preston Federline? I thought it was Preston Sturges Federline Spears. Wasn’t it Robert Preston Spears Federline at one point? And weren’t they toying with the idea of naming the kid London, but Kevin backed out because “yo, America hates those […]
The weekend is upon us, and for many parents out there, it’s time to be athletic supporters. Some parents in Raleigh, North Carolina do merit comparison to smelly jock straps, thanks to their behavior at local youth football games. Unsportsmanlike behavior by rabid Raleigh football moms and dads reached English Soccer Match levels last year. […]
I must’ve spent twenty minutes trying to compress Mark David Wright’s deeds into a concise headline. Perry White I am not. Mr. Wright was arrested by Australian police after staggering down the streets of his hometown clad in naught but his tightie-whities, toting a loaded shotgun.
Local authorities report that Mr. Wright left his […]
A while back, a good woman named Jeanne Caroline lost her son because someone else’s idiot father left a loaded gun in plain reach. Henderson, Nevada father Geoffrey Wellls has lost his son to gun violence as well - except, in this case, Wells is as much part of the problem as he is victim. […]
Is it any wonder David Myers grew up so damaged? When he was born, his mother, Judith Myers, told his father and anyone else who would listen that his dark skin was jaundice. She never told anyone - not even David himself - the truth: that his father was really a black man with whom […]
William and Rachel Blow (no relation to 80’s rap superstar Kurtis) came up with a novel solution to their teenage son’s rambunctious behavior. They chained him up. Fortunately, the boy’s sister reported this to local police, who freed him from his shackles, and gave the Blows some of their own medicine. Unfortunately, the […]
Michigan, as it turns out, suffered very little damage from Hurricane Katrina. This came as a surprise to Kim Horn, who received a house, cash, and other goods after reporting to charities that she was a victim of Katrina. Turns out Ms. Horn and her 6 year old daughter moved to Mason, Michigan […]
When I sent out my Welcome message for our new writers last week, I didn’t know that I’d be bringing on a sixth person. But then LizBeth Finn-Arnold told me she wanted to pitch in. As big a fan as I am of her writing, there was no way I could say no. She’s been […]
I’ve been looking for the opportunity to apply the phrase “walking pile of amphibian shit” to someone; thanks, Michelle Stevenson, for stepping up! Stevenson was arrested for selling thousands of obscene photos of her three children to a kiddie porn website. Also nabbed was the site owner, Brian Cobb. Both face up […]
Expect to see Daniel Herbert and his son Josh on the short list for this year’s Darwin Awards. Daniel, you see, is of the opinion that having a 450-pound black bear as a housepet is a good idea. But wait! It gets better! Daniel also thinks that his ursine buddy is an excellent sparing partner […]
Parenting so bad it's criminal
Written by Trench Reynolds [email] for b5media.
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