Thank You, Britney Spears
Dear Britney Spears:
The staff of Parents Behaving Badly thanks you from the bottom of our blog for giving birth to a baby boy. Your pregnancy itself has been so hilarious that we’re sure you will give us much entertaining fodder for years to come.
Don’t get us wrong. It’s not that we think you’ll be a shitty mom. You’re certainly nowhere near the low caliber of many of the alleged human beings we feature here. But you’re…oh, how to say it? Let’s just note that you won’t be thanking the Nobel committee any time soon, and leave it at that. Besides, if you can’t make fun of Britney Spears, who can you make fun of, ya know??
We’re sure the constant ribbing we’ll give you regarding your parenting practices as they leak out will be hard on you. They might even occasionally cause you to crumble onto your couch in a fetal position and eat Ben & Jerry’s pints with your bare hands as you watch a sappy Lifetime movie through your wall of tears.
And for that, we only wish we could say we were sorry.
Sincerely,
Parents Behaving Badly
Tags: baby, birth, Britney Spears, britney-spears, kevin+federline, parents+behaving+badlyRelated Stories
POSTED IN: Britney Spears, baby
9 opinions for Thank You, Britney Spears
Chris @ Deliberate Chaos
Sep 14, 2005 at 7:49 pm
I foresee a “Growing Up Spears” in the future featuring Britney’s messed up children.
Sure to be featured: lots of shoeless feet, guys without shirts, belching contests, and all sorts of other hijinks. Of course, Britney will be yelling and screaming at the kids.
It will be billed as the future of America.
Chris
http://d-chaos.blogspot.com
BA~~32
rachel
Sep 14, 2005 at 9:38 pm
No Nobel?!? Bah! Spoken like a man who’s never seen THIS: http://britneyspears.ac/lasers.htm
momma2mingbu
Sep 15, 2005 at 5:18 am
I still want to know if her c/s was actualy medically indicated or if she was “too good” to go through labor like the rest of us. I read somewhere about her being terified of labor and that she said she “has a feeling I’ll be having an operation.”
As a lactivist momma, I also wonder if she’s breastfeeding. :)
Kel
Sep 15, 2005 at 6:34 am
I still want to know if her c/s was actualy medically indicated or if she was “too good” to go through labor like the rest of us.
Everything I’ve heard says that she had an elective c-section. I must admit I laughed my butt off after hearing that. Honey if you don’t want to deal with labor, DON’T GET PREGNANT.
Marti
Sep 15, 2005 at 7:39 am
Aw, but doncha know that “Baby’s first tattoo” is gonna be a jewel of a photo for the family album? Let’s get scrapbooking, Britney!
jillmalitz
Sep 15, 2005 at 7:50 am
Let’s just hope she doesnt get hooked on pain meds since she had a C-section. Does this mean she wont be wearing any more really, really low rise jeans or will she want to proudly show her surgery scar?
suburban misfit
Sep 15, 2005 at 8:14 am
I have a special place in the “detest” section of my heart for women who choose to have a c-section when it’s not medically indicated. I had an emergency c-section when my son’s heartbeat stopped, so I have little sympathy for those who “can’t handle” labor.
Gosh, I hope they give him a good name we can really make fun of!!
momma2mingbu
Sep 15, 2005 at 9:07 am
I think it’s sad that a doctor would do an ELECTIVE c/s on a first time mother. The c/s rate in the country is bad enough as it is. Vaginal birth is safer for both mom and baby. CHOOSING to introduce the additional risks involved with a c/s just because mom doesn’t want to go through labor is a pretty selfish decision. You’re off to a great start in my book Britney. (NOT!)
Andrea
Sep 15, 2005 at 4:19 pm
I wonder if she got that c-section with the optional Celebrity Tummy Tuck, a la Posh Spice?